Head Shaving Party!

Here we go....

Tonight I decided to go ahead and shave my head.  This was a hard decision for me.  I still have a lot of hair.  In fact, Dr. Bott couldn't believe I still had so much hair.  Same with the ladies at chemo.  The good thing is that my hair is already so short.   But, it is falling out like crazy.  It is shedding all over my pillow and comes out with great ease just running my hands through it.  I have to blow dry it over the bath tub to catch the falling hair but it still gets everywhere.   Now my scalp is quite tender as well.  It feels like someone is pulling my hair with a sunburned scalp.  Not very pleasant.  So, I figured it was about time. I knew some family wanted to be there for the whole freak show hair shaving thing so I decided to make a little party out of it.  I ordered some breast cancer pink ribbon donuts specially made and dipped in pink frosting and had pink and chocolate milk.  I was committed.  However, as people began to show they too couldn't believe how much hair I still had.  I started second guessing myself thinking maybe I should just go as long as I can and keep my hair.  But I already got the donuts, people were coming, plans were made.  What do I do now?  I recognize now a little bit of panic to the upcoming change going on.  I had to remind myself how much hair was coming out and what a mess it was making everywhere.  I was ready to do this.  I let anyone who wanted to come and tug out my hair.  It is quite fascinating how easy it pulls out.  A little freaky buy funny too.   Bit of a sensitive head but not too bad.  Mostly just kids who took me up on that.  Brendon got a good 'ol yank.  I felt that.   And then, with family, friends, and neighbors, and lots of wide-eyed kids gathered round, Brendon began the shave.  We decided to have a little fun so he shaved the sides first leaving me with a sweet mohawk for a picture or two.   Then it all came off.  Just a buzz.  Little by little.  Buffy, my sister-in-law and my personal greatest hairdresser, helped to clean in up a bit and shave the pink ribbon symbol in my hair.  I was feeling pretty good about everything, Ok....slightly freaked, but I was holding it together well until I looked up and saw my dad's face as he began to tear up.  And then, I lost it too.  The water works began to fall.  I wasn't really sad as much as  maybe just reacting to the whole change of everything.  The love and support of this whole group of people was overwhelming to me.  I was a bit embarrassed as they all stood in a semi circle around me with their anxious expressions.  But, when it was all over and done with, the compliments flew.  So much support and love and wonderful expressions given.  I decided that is why we include people in our moments of trial and difficulties.  I was filled with love and confidence from all.  Although, I did wonder many times what was REALLY going through their heads (like...."what has she done?" or "Oh, the horror of it all!").  I felt like a celebrity with all the flashing lights from their cameras to capture the crazy moments.  All in all, I can't believe I did it, it feels different, but good and I am OK with this change.  Just another part of this whole cancer process.  I am confident that is because of such amazing support and love from everyone.  Thank you for taking your Friday night plans to spend it with us.  Finished the night off by going to a movie with Kenn and Allison and the kids.  What a great night for me.  So good to laugh and feel happy!

pulling out my hair--oooo, so fun!

Baldy love!

yummy donut treats

my best look yet

who do I look take more like now?  love u mom & dad!

love my Bluth sissy's!

Love my Dayton sissy's!

mugshot skin head club members